"Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive." Anaïs Nin

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Monday, August 26, 2013

Releasing Worry

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothes?”   Matthew 6:25

 “Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?”   Matthew 6:27

These questions were asked by Jesus over 2 millennia ago.

I’ve struggled with worry most of my life. As a child of a man who was not only an alcoholic, but a narcissist, I worried about every word I said. I was often in trouble for having a different opinion or perspective. There was no pleasing him, and I was always in trouble. What was worse, he always took it out on my mom. Life was better for my mom if I did not speak my truth, my thoughts or my ideas. It was better not to say much of anything around my dad while I was growing up, and I worried about every word I spoke and what was going to happen when I did. He had a way of taking things I said, and transposing them into things he thought I was “really” saying from his perspective. To correct him was to invite wrath. To keep peace for my mom and for me, it was better to let him think what he wanted, and let him believe he was right, because that was more important to him. As long as he was right, we lived in peace. While my mother and I constantly worried, we found life to be better if we acquiesced and agreed he was always right about us, and kept ourselves quiet and out of arguments.

Worry led to negativity and overly critical thinking that only heaped more piles of stress onto me. Over time, I was plagued by many ailments, asthma, sensitivities to all kinds of environmental triggers, thyroid disease and an ability to catch every virus that going around along with delayed recovery rates from each one.

Because so much of my life was spent with others closest to me telling me to “Shut up” and “You don’t know what you’re talking about”, I eventually “lost my voice” so to speak. I wasn’t heard. I was oppressed by what I allowed others to transpose onto me. When I did speak the truth plainly, what I often said fell onto deaf ears, which is strangely odd, because I’m the one who is actually deaf.

I love how God gently brought me to a place of healing. He knew I could not be healed living where I was when I began this journey toward better health.

 “Captivating” by John and Stasi Eldredge was the beginning of this journey to healing. It was the most spiritual and loving gift any man had ever given me. The first time I met Fabulous Husband face to face, he placed this book into my hands. That day, I not only began to heal, but to live and to love and to trust. I had no idea the depth of spiritual healing I needed. This one book reached into my heart and began to salve decades of wounds that had gone unchecked and unattended. It forced me to revisit many hurtful events and words, to acknowledge them, and to realize God doesn’t hurt people – hurting people hurt people. I could start letting those things go and look past them to a God who created me with a beautiful soul that was meant for love, to love, to be loved… and that I am loved.

Through all this, I learned a major truth.

The opposite of worry is trust.

By releasing all worry, I am embracing trust. Trust that God not only cares about me, but provides for me. He provides things I don’t even realize I need or want. This is deeply profound.

By releasing worry, I am allowing God to take care of me as a loving, healthy Father takes care of his children. It took me a long time to understand this, because my own father was not a reflection of the kind of Father that God is.

God loves me and wants me, but often I had measured God by which I measured my earthly father. I had this backwards. My earthly father really should have followed the example God Himself had set. Unlike my earthly father, God wants the best for me, loves me unconditionally and showers me with gifts in spiritual and material realms - on earth as in heaven.

When I look at the attributes of Jesus, I see unconditional love, compassion, kindness, gentleness, wisdom, provision and healing. Jesus didn’t just preach. Jesus fed the hungry, healed the sick, and spent time with people of every walk of life. He brought peace to those who were seeking peace, rest to those who were weary and seeking rest. Even in the midst of the storms on the sea, he was peaceful and brought peace to his shipmates by causing the sea and the storm to calm.

If Jesus released all worry and exemplified peace and wished peace for us, shouldn’t I, too, embrace peace?

Jesus is also quoted as saying, “Peace be unto you” and “Fear not”.

Since I’ve started this healing journey and learned this truth about releasing worry, I’ve had fewer illnesses and asthma attacks. I was directed to an audiologist who was astute enough to realize that the symptoms I was having was not from my chronic ear disease, but something else, and she saved my life by sending me to a surgeon who performed a necessary surgery. (My thyroid had nodules, had grown into my neck and wrapped itself around my windpipe. It not only was slowly choking me to death, it was pressing against a nerve that was causing me to fall down all the time-since the surgery, I’ve not fallen down as before.)

I learned about Reiki during the month I was diagnosed and had my surgery. God provided me with the tools of using self Reiki to aid in my recovery, not just for the physical healing, but the emotional healing as well. Through classes provided by Reiki by Rickie, I relearned Biblical truths which brought exponential healing and health this past year. There are five Biblical truths that Dr. Usui calls the Five Principles of Reiki. They are:

Just for today, I release all anger.

Just for today, I release all worry.

I shall earn my living with integrity.

I shall honor every living thing.

I shall show gratitude for all my many blessings.

Worry has been the main issue I’ve had to deal with most in my life. Today, looking back, I can see how God strategically placed people into my life to bring me to this lesson, this truth.

Each moment I release a fear or worry is a moment I embrace trust, peace and healing. 


  1. I can so relate to this post. I grew up with hearing loss, but it wasn't high on my list of things that were hard, so I didn't even consider it a very big problem in childhood and young adulthood. I had so much more to deal with, and yes, worry was included in that. I grew up with a mother who was emotionally and mentally unstable. My sister and I were the adults and she was the child, many times. Thank God my grandmother lived with us for most of my childhood, but there were a few years when it was just the three of us and it was pure torture.

    Isn't it wonderful how God can bring us to a place of healing? For me, once grown and away from the place I grew up, I focused on having the family I never had. Moving around with my husband's military service and then with his civilian career, and having four children to raise and enjoy kept me from dealing with all that was troubling in my childhood, but when life slowed down and I had more time, my past insisted on being dealt with. My healing came in part due to reconnecting with a long lost childhood friend. In recounting my life to him, I was healed through writing. At the time we reconnected, I was looking for that little girl that I once was, and my friend remembered her perfectly.

    I'm lucky, as are you, God put just what I needed in my path. :o)

    Here's another take on worry... my Grandma always told me, "Worry is the opposite of faith."

    All the best,

    1. Michele, your Grandma was a wise woman. I'm so glad you reconnected with your friend who encouraged you to write, which aided in your own healing. Thank you for sharing your experience here today. Blessings to you.

  2. Joyce- Thank you for sharing YOUR experiences. I was lucky to have what I would call pretty normal parent's. I had a classmate in elementary school that was always being slapped by his parents. I could not imagine what it would be like to live in a home like that. Unfortunately, he and I were not friends for long. During a game of dodge ball he walked up to me and slapped me. I was never slapped by any kid before. My fast response was not a slap but a very effective application of my fist. Off to the principle's office for me.
    I guess where I am going with my story is that a child's environment can really effect their life as they get older.
    In any case your son Bear is lucky to have a wonderful Mom and a fabulous Dad.

  3. Neil, thank you for your very kind words and always stopping by the blog, and being not only a supporter, but an encourager as well. Thank you also for sharing with us in return

  4. Thank you for another insightful post, Joyce. Lately I have felt as though God is asking me, "Do you trust me?" Placing my trust in Him has helped me with my worry habit.
    I'm going to google "Captivating" and reiki now.
    Thanks again,

    1. You are very welcome, Sarah! I will be sharing a post this week I put together about what Reiki is, too. :-)